It's another sandwich of a day. Yesterday was the last Wednesday in August, and tomorrow is the 29th, both the day that one year ago my precious baby boy, Ezra died.
It's been interesting getting to know you, you're not here any more either. Your friend Kendall has nothing but mysteriously good things to say about your life, always leaving me wanting to hear more, curious what you and Karen and your boys look like, and how the story goes on from here. I wish I knew you.
I needed my visit with Kendall this morning, it felt good to cry and I honestly felt like you were with Ezra for a moment. At times I feel like I have to justify why I know this, but then I allow myself to just let it be and it is, and I was really comforted by the thought.
I'm not sure what all this is about. Life and death are such weighty matters, but as life unfolds day by day, and I tap into it's treasures and misfortunes, it's good to meet you even after your gone.
Seems an unlikely place to be here on my blog to say this, but, thank you so much for this morning. I went straight from your house to mine, to see Jean, and I was trying to tell her all that the morning meant to me, how stories were intertwining, how special the gifts were, and the open spirtual sense I had afterward, and it all seemed very muttled.
I love you!
I love you. This year has seen us at our worst and we have loved through it. I cannot imagine my life without you. Thanks for being wild.
I love you!
Malachi and Josiah,
You are my hope. Every day that I get up is for you. I want to make the most of this futile life for you. I hope me and daddy teach you how to love and appreciate everything around you.
KUNG FU! I love you! Momma
I love you Baby Ezra, I miss you one year later.